Reflections From the Journey

Thank you for bringing me gifts
Even those I wanted to return
I continue to heal
And whether you are from my past
Or are with me still today
I thank thee
My relationships varied:
Painful
Pleasant
Delightful
Ephemeral
Sad
Antagonistic
Caring
Short lived
Casual
Spiritual
Fleeting
Beautiful
Friendly
Unrequited
Loving
Abusive
Confusing
Jealous
Passionate
Deep
Through you
I discover me
And guide the path for others
Thank you. 

Hollows

In the hollow
Of the night
As I stand
On the icy branch
High up in the tree
Wafting in cold
I am alone
No one hears
My cries
They are frozen
Even from my ears
My existence
Futile
I wish for death
This Christmas
Sitting on Santa's lap
Respite unavailable
Muted sleigh bells
Reindeer silenced
Gagged
Giving
Bows untied
Yellowed wrapping paper
Stacks of Styrofoam containers
Water no longer running
Kitchen dishes
In the tub
Cracked panes of windows
Not able to get warm
Nightly addictions
On angel wings
Broken halos
No one cares about
Weeping
Wishes
Too late
Forgotten cocoon
Of perceived innocence
There is no balm in Gilead
To make the wounded
Whole

Behind Closed Doors

Fire
Water
Wind
Sea
Tension
in my house
Is
Killing
Me
Caterpillars
Butterflies
Cocoons
Wings
My throat
Slit
I
Can
No
Longer
Sing

Grim Reaper

Today his body rests
Returned to the earth
That gave him birth
His spirit long departed
As I scatter his ashes
Along the banks of the mighty Mississippi
I hear him laughing
In the breeze
That comes to caress my lonely soul
I see him smiling
In my bedroom
As he ties me to the chair
The one in front of the mirror
His reflection I see
Hunting for that mirror
The one I anticipated
Night after night
When I finally embrace his love
His dominance
Partnered with my submission
I find myself crying
Embracing his strong arms
And his grizzled beard
Of my imagination
Mirroring the visage
Of his tender face
In the depths
Of my continued longing
In a weeping memorial
And a celebration of life.

Severed

I wanted a friend
That's all I ever desired
And now
Strange things have happened
With no explanations
I can levitate
Really I can
And you
Your body lay frozen
In that hidden ravine
That body I nestled next to
When I was cold
I'll never know why
You severed ties once again
Every nine months so it seems
We shan't walk barefoot in the park
Any more
Why did you leave
When you clearly held out your hand
And beckoned me to take it
I knew you were falling fast
But I never imagined
The end
This way
Don't trust the amoral bastard
Don't trust the amoral bastard
This doesn't make any sense
I hope you're happy
I will burn the one book I own
Of yours
I have this strange feeling you had
Nothing to do with this
Yet confessions are not bold
The private dick will get to the bottom of this
I weep once again
Mourning the help you offered
Closing off self
Oblivious to those I used to touch
My inner sanctum
Franklin was right all along:
Three may keep a secret
If two are dead. 

Love You Like I Do

I love you like I love
The sound of a soft rain
Pattering on the rooftop
In the middle of the night
My own musical ambience
Without the cost of admission

I love you like I love
A Fall breeze
Caressing my cheeks
And ruffling my skirt
On the top of the Empire State Building
Feeling a bit like Marilyn Monroe

I love you like I love
Homemade hash brown potatoes
Grated by hand
Onions added
And sautéed in olive oil
Crispy, warm, and moist

I love you like I love
Visiting my father
On Sunday nights
Djing at WPRE
Passionately spinning records
And lighting up the moment he saw me
You make me feel loved

I love you like I love
Being tied up
With ribbons, silk, and rope
Anything that binds
Anticipating that with is primal
Dominant and intense

I love you like I love
Being loved by you
Curled up in your arms
Sexy and secure
Draping my leg over yours
Smiling
As we skip the Chinese
And fall asleep in each other's embrace
Thank you for loving me
And not abandoning me
As others have
I'll see you in the morning.  

Torn Tapestries

You are inside my mind
And my memories
Reading my mind
Walking among my memories
I am inside your mind
And your memories
Reading your mind
Walking among your memories
We are compatible
Yet alone
Separate
Despondent
Our worlds just a door away
I am afraid
But is one angel worth a thousand
Monsters?
No one is coming to help
My life means nothing
Without you
I am alone
Purpose hidden
Please hear my cries
The tapestries are torn
My body doesn't age
Here's to the slow path
Our hearts are one
The stars are aligned
But you are gone
Please visit again
Stay with me
I don't want to die alone
I say I'm all right
But we both know that's a lie
Why survive
When one only can die
Know that all things are possible
Believe
My child
We will meet again someday
Know that I loved you
I'm sorry